Differences

I met my husband, Chuck, about one year after my divorce. I was a single mother of a four year old, attending college to complete my undergraduate degree. A group of fellow students went to a local pub to discuss the day. We were sitting around laughing and talking when a waitress brought me a drink and told me it was from the "man" over there--and pointed to a young Marine sitting with a couple of friends. I laughed and waved and thought, "Well isn't he cute?" I was 26 years old at the time. I went over and thanked him for the drink, and found out his name was Chuck. It was then I discovered that he had just turned 20. I invited him to call me sometime at work and returned to my friends.

The very next day Chuck called me at work and asked me out. I figured, "Why not?" That was the beginning of a wonderful, unusual, family story. We married the next year after Chuck turned 21. Although the age issue was discussed by us, we felt we could overcome any problems, since we were "adults".

Most people did not realize the difference upon sight. But, when filling out forms or discussing facts with people we always received second looks. Especially when Chuck introduced his son, Adam, after he turned 6 and Chuck was still 21. You could see the math working in their minds.... a father! at 15! and on top of that is wife would have been 21! We'd just laugh!

Now, let me discribe us a bit. I am fair, freckled, large boned and about 5'7", Chuck is olive toned, about 5"9" and slim. Adam at this age was dark haired and slight. About one year after marriage we decided to add to our family. I was unable to become pregnant again, and we decided to adopt. I should also point out that Chuck was adopted at birth. For four years we worked toward adopting. We attended classes, filed out forms, etc.

Finally, we received a call in June 1991, asking if we would be interested in a newborn, mixed race child? YES! I was raised and lived in the south all my life. My father, a wonderful man, often made somewhat racist comments during my life. My mother always encouraged fairness and tempered then statements. I went to them first to tell them the news and make sure no problem would exist. My father became very upset that I would even think he would be concerned. This boy would be his grandson and that was all that mattered!!!

We, (Chuck, Adam, and myself,) went to pick up Will, our new son/brother, one month after he was born. He was beautiful. Friends and family decorated the house, gave showers, supplied furniture. Will was now part of the family.

From the beginning Will always loved the story of how we went to pick him up. He knows his father was adopted, he knows he is bi-racial. For years people have commented on his dark good looks, then they look at me and Chuck and Adam and get that puzzled look again--especially when we assure them that we are his mother and father. Another funny side note is that Adam, by now a teenager, stands 6"2"! We make quite a cute family picture!

Although Will has been called names by a few children at school, he understands the need to educate people about the fact that being different is not the same as having something wrong with you. He thinks its funny too that his Momma is older than his Daddy. (But then again his Grandma is older than his Granddad by three years!)

So where does this all lead to? A family lacking in stereotypes and with an over-abundance of humor and positive outlooks. We love to show people that differences can be accepted and down right fun at times! I think we still get funny looks, but we don't seem to notice anymore. We're too busy being a family.